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Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Skinny & beautiful.


Hi,my name is Dennia,but people call me Nia. Did you read all that? I was like that. I've attempted suicide too,but I didn't use a rope. I starved myself & I did cut myself & the weirdest thing is I don't know why. I've never really liked myself,I think I'm stupid,ugly & no one really likes me. Sometimes the people who I rely on the most always say something to bring me down,even though I tell myself it's not true,I still listened & it eventually stayed in me & made me a monster. I was misjudged,misunderstood & underestimated.  I had depression,the funny thing is that no one knew,not even myself. There are days where I would be totally cheerful as sunbeams & totally gloomy as the sky when it's about to rain. I would not sleep,cuz I couldn't & I'd be awake being manic & reading a book all night or writing stuffs in my journal. I felt like I'm nothing. I try to hard to be everything though,pretty,popular & wanted. I admit this. All my life I just want to be pretty but I never felt pretty. I don't know why & how did all these feelings develop,all I know I that I have a problem with myself & I am not normal,I'm a sick girl.


Now,I am 16 years old,turning 17 this November. And when I blow my birthday cake,all I will wish for is bliss. I just want to be happy & healthy. Now,I believe in myself more than anybody else. I love myself. I am beautiful just the way I am. It took me a very long time to realize this. I don't know why. I love my mom. She is the nicest person I've ever known. I want to be healthy & happy for my mom. I am a nice person,I don't think I will ever hate myself ever again. I don't want people to think that it's cool to have an eating disorder & talk freely about it. As long as you don't brag about it,I don't think there's anything wrong. IT IS A BIG DEAL. Some girl out there might be dying,some might be crazy already. Do they need help? YES.

Please join this facebook page called EAT share it around if you or anybody you know has any kinds of issues in life. Especially girls :) It's a small thing,but I know it can help others in a way.