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Thursday, September 29, 2011

Happy birthday mom!! You're turning 49 :)

This was when I went to Sabah last year. I don't look good cuz I wasn't feeling good. Anyways,this is a post dedicated to my mom even though she doesn't read my blog. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAMA!!!!  ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

I got 1k+ visitors per day,sometimes hundred+. I blogged about that small little page I made on Facebook for girls with insecurity issues & eating disorder & I got only 4 likes? YOU GUYS SUCK. Period. Cuz even though it is a small thing,it meant a lot to me cuz going through all that wasn't easy for me & I was looking for some supporters. Since you guys can't bloody like the page for me I might as well delete it. I'll set up something better next time,when I'm somebody. This is hella upsetting.

Yeah I also blogged about my past,yesterday,just go to my archive or scroll & you'll see the story. Hope it helps some of you. Cuz being sick isn't cool & I just want everyone to be happy & healthy :) alright??? Trials are officially over,fyeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I can watch Gossip Girl all day with ease but I still have to study,the real thing is so much more important than trials. DUH.

I bought NYLON September issue.  ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ Christina Ricci on the cover & I love her eye make up,it emphasizes on her big huge eyes. Fyi for one single issue,(the current one),it will cost like RM16.90 cuz it's a Brooklyn based magazine,so I usually buy it if I really like & want that issue & I did! I love this issue as much as I love the Florence Welch issue & I definitely will get the October issue cuz Elizabeth Olsen is on the cover! I just freaking love this magazine,they have some of the most epic & unique editorials ever & the pages  will never bore the eff out you especially if you are a self proclaimed indie chick like me :) I also read the website every time I'm online,I heart it. 

Alexa Chung in Mary Katrantzou

Her green nails that she's obsessed with.

Christina Ricci in Pan Am

This short film is inspired by the downtown cool, rock sensibility and international lifestyle embodied by model Abbey Lee Kershaw, this debut short film introducing the Pierre Balmain collection follows Abbey Lee and her band, Our Mountain, throughout New York City. Directed by Inez and Vinoodh, this film features pieces from the Pierre Balmain women's and men's collection worn by Abbey Lee and her boyfriend, Our Mountain front man Matthew Hutchinson. (Yeah I stole this from youtube)

I freaking love Balmain! If you guys wanna see some of his jackets you can go watch 2NE1's 'Lonely' video :) Yet again,he is one of my favourite designers & if you love anything studded & rock & roll or maybe you love Taylor Momsen's style like me,you'd dig Balmain. 

Xoxo! (btw I'm on twitter & tumblr all the time so follow me there!)

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Skinny & beautiful.


Hi,my name is Dennia,but people call me Nia. Did you read all that? I was like that. I've attempted suicide too,but I didn't use a rope. I starved myself & I did cut myself & the weirdest thing is I don't know why. I've never really liked myself,I think I'm stupid,ugly & no one really likes me. Sometimes the people who I rely on the most always say something to bring me down,even though I tell myself it's not true,I still listened & it eventually stayed in me & made me a monster. I was misjudged,misunderstood & underestimated.  I had depression,the funny thing is that no one knew,not even myself. There are days where I would be totally cheerful as sunbeams & totally gloomy as the sky when it's about to rain. I would not sleep,cuz I couldn't & I'd be awake being manic & reading a book all night or writing stuffs in my journal. I felt like I'm nothing. I try to hard to be everything though,pretty,popular & wanted. I admit this. All my life I just want to be pretty but I never felt pretty. I don't know why & how did all these feelings develop,all I know I that I have a problem with myself & I am not normal,I'm a sick girl.


Now,I am 16 years old,turning 17 this November. And when I blow my birthday cake,all I will wish for is bliss. I just want to be happy & healthy. Now,I believe in myself more than anybody else. I love myself. I am beautiful just the way I am. It took me a very long time to realize this. I don't know why. I love my mom. She is the nicest person I've ever known. I want to be healthy & happy for my mom. I am a nice person,I don't think I will ever hate myself ever again. I don't want people to think that it's cool to have an eating disorder & talk freely about it. As long as you don't brag about it,I don't think there's anything wrong. IT IS A BIG DEAL. Some girl out there might be dying,some might be crazy already. Do they need help? YES.

Please join this facebook page called EAT share it around if you or anybody you know has any kinds of issues in life. Especially girls :) It's a small thing,but I know it can help others in a way.


Thursday, September 22, 2011

Why not? + I am crazy over this couple

Ola!!!!! I'm gonna be home for today & tomorrow,so yay,means I get to chill at home & do nothing :) I went on Tumblr yesterday just to freaking post something Victorious related & if you don't know what the fish is Victorious it's a tv show airing at Nickelodeon & even though my bias is Victoria Justice I am crazy over this couple named Beck & Jade,they are so perfect together,how can you not like sweet couples?!!

Go ahead,say awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww :D
I know,some of you may like those typical cheesy love kinda couple,I like this kinda couple,they are realistic & I love how Beck is so patient no matter how feisty Jade is,plus he's cute & she's hot so what is bad about that? Heh I like good looking people AND couples. I love how they sit,Jade is always wrapping one leg over Beck & he's always hugging her & I love it when they kiss,they are so cute!!

Which reminds me. I got a list of things to do in my teenage dream list,SO MANY freaking things to do which I will do very very slowly,one at a time,one at a time. I'm not emo or anything but I love piercings & tattoos,I'm an anti emo person okay. I am planning to get wordings on my arms,I even found out what fonts I wanna use already. As for piercings,I did a navel piercing when I was 15 & it turned out bad,so bad I am NEVER ever gonna pierce any part of me except for my ear at that place,I think they use some made in China tools. So I'm getting my navel pierced again to cover up the dot there which is my father effing scar & I might be piercing my eyebrow,the right one,I don't think I might,I think I will do it,it's pretty & I don't care what people think,just don't call me emo or I'll stab you with a fork.

Doesn't look that painful to me,well..not to someone who has had a needle stuck in her flesh before (I'm talking about myself)

My current facebook status. It's something personal but I thought of sharing something just as a reminder to my other facebook buddies about appreciating what they got,just a little something. I got nothing on fashion lately,but I do know London Fashion week started last Friday :) I am gonna go on later to check out the runway designs,British designer I love,Vivienne Westwood! If any of you peepoes watched Sex in the city the movie,Carrie Bradshaw wore a dress from Vivienne for her wedding,it's so puffy & gorgeous,here,a little sneak peak.



Monday, September 19, 2011

1,288 visitors baby!

Woah thank you so much peepoes!!! 
My first time having 1k+ visitors in a day!!
This might be SO normal for other people but I'm not some father effing famous blogger or anything so this is pretty cool. Thank you again :)

I had a bad day,I screw up on paper 2 science today,the weather in school was freaking chilly & I was so restless throughout the whole entire paper 2 cuz I was fussing over my answers. Anyway,leave it to God,lets see how it goes :) My science stream friends are sitting biology today,laugh out loud,was it fun? :D life sucks thanks to exam. I updated my tumblr with something too today. I re-do some stuffs on this blog cuz it was getting messier & I don't think I have the guts to change my url cuz I've been using it for 2 years already,I can't just throw it away :( OH OH OH!! I added a music playlist down there,feel free to turn it on if you wanna listen to the songs,most of em are uhmazing songs that I love listening to. Comment down there,I'm bored,would like to hear bout what you guys are up to or if you have anything you want me to check out,like your blog or whatever,feel free to comment about it & I'll check it out. Xoxo. Nia.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

The 'A' week

I sat 2 previous subjects that I aim to get an A for. Now I have 3 subjects left to ace,hoping to get 80% & above,not an easy task but I'm gonna try,for me,getting 5A's for this trials is a big deal,cuz if I can get 5A's I can raise the bar higher & aim for 7A's. I always believe in possibilities. Why not? 

I'm tired of being underestimated,misjudged & misunderstood. Maybe & hopefully,with results,even though not excellent,I can prove that I do have the brains to do things. I seriously fucking hate it when people say I rely on being pretty to survive,I am not even that pretty,so why do I need to rely on my pimply face? Laugh out loud? Since I can't blog much & I got no inspirations lately maybe I'll do vlogs,they are more random & I guess some of my readers wouldn't mind seeing me talking plus I am a random person anyways :D 

I randomly recorded this for baby V,a friend :) just some words of encouragement. She likes it! So do other people,I guess they all agree with what I say. I do have a thing for doing videos lately & I am in love with this girl named Lexi (not literally la). 

I also might be changing missbanania to something else. I don't like it,it's starting to bug me. I'm trying to come up with something more catchy :) can you help me figure it out?? Then I'm gonna change my blog url & also my email. Take care guys! xoxo

Thursday, September 15, 2011

MY Challenge 2011

When I don't blog,money won't come into my account,but thank God I still got some money pouring in & I also don't do adverts lately,I'm lazy,but I blog for fun,not for money,so nevermind. GUESS HOW MANY FREAKING DAYS I DIDN'T BLOG? I lost count,I'm bad at math anyways & I still have exams,just that I don't care,I have to be online & update something on facebook. I went to support one of my most epic friends last Saturday at KDU,baby Vaneesha,she joined this Olympic themed competition where many kids from different schools come compete in different categories,I didn't know that it was THIS competitive & the participants are THAT talented :) I had no camera,nothing,so photos are from MY Challenge's official facebook page,go support!! These are a few pictures from the event,I'm gonna put weird & interesting captions for each of them,I don't care what you say,hahahhahaa. Some are from my epic friends' camera,the shutter bugs.

I look fair. Look at Reenosha,like diva sial,Reenosh,if you reading this,honestly you are like Malaysian's Rihanna :D

These girls are really hot & they have the cutest outfits ever,they danced to Candyman :)

Every school has their own large banner displayed outside the auditorium,awesome sial. THIS IS baby Vaneesha & a banner of herself,look at her before her stage costumes & make up,hahahah!! Still so cute :)

This girl,Christine Nah I think,her group won best dance group,they are really awesome cuz they danced to 2NE1's song plus her hair really made her stand out,looks like Sandara Park's hair eh?

The emcee's

We got the chance to meet,talk & take photos with Jeremy from He is such a cutie!!!!!! 

They sang 'I see the light' from Tangled,so much chemistry & they are really sweet together. My favourite duet,cuz I think the girl,Jodi,is really cute,hahahaha I like pretty people :)

They made me laugh :) Bronze winner for the drama category.

Drama category,silver medal winners.

Henry Golding,one of the highlights of that day,everyone wants him!!


Reenosha is truly shameless & I'm proud of her,she grabbed every chance she can just to get near him & take photos with him & talk to him & get his autograph,it's good to be shameless!

Even Lorraine also starstruck. Reminds me of Selena & Justin :)

US!!! From the left,me :) Samantha,Michelle,Henry,Reenosha

GROUP PHOTO!!!! After everything is finished,we just have to take a group shot :) The banner I'm holding,the green one,is made by Ngui,literally has socks on it,but he took them down & went home,lol.

What Neesha wore for her performance :) Lookin like a queen

She sang 'Someone like you' by Adele by the way :)

The cutest mak cik there with his signature pose :)

Pretty people.

Cute people.

How can I forget about myself & mr Golding????!!! Don't even bother asking how it felt meeting him,I was shaking the whole time & can't even look at his face but nevermind la,got picture,so that I can lie to my kids in the future that he used to be my boyfriend.

Lastly,for Vaneesha,the main reason I blogged today was because of you,I have something to say.
Another cheesy post,but you won't care,cuz I know this will make your day :)
You did really well,you went on stage,you sang,you made us clap & cheer,who needs medals when you have a bunch of supportive people??? & people who love you??? :) We will always be there for you,so don't ever worry about your performance being good or bad cuz it is always good to us,we just want to see you do your thing! I hope you will continue singing,it is a gift given to you. You made my day,I think in fact,you made our day so much more worthwhile that day :) WE LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! And I will always be there for you. Yes go on,be touched,I'm awesome :)

Wednesday, September 07, 2011


I'm back from school!!! English & BM has been okay so far,no BIG problem or any issues even though I did skip certain parts for BM cuz I had no idea what to do at that section but who cares I did the rest & I think I can get full marks at certain areas so bravo to me. I had to come up & blog & write something,I'm having maths tomorrow so before I start doing my revisions I wanna do something else. And oh yeah I added a tab to go to my Tumblr up there,my friend actually asked why I have Tumblr when I already have a blog? Tumbr is normally where I can go emo & sentimental or just plain madness. So navigate yourself through all these tabs provided cuz I ain't so free to tell you twice :) I will be coming up to write whenever I can,usually I will be on twitter so follow me there if you haven't cuz I tweet everytime even during exams just to rant,lol. Okay, hard alright? If you are like me & aren't confident in certain subjects (as for me I suck at maths),try your best la,don't give up just cuz you feel useless already (even though I feel useless too). A friend of mine once say that you don't have to get an A,getting a 10% when you got only 9% previously is also a tiny step of improvement so there's room for more,this is just the trials,who knows during the real thing you will get better results? Maybe a pass to those who always fail? And maybe an A to those who always get average marks? We can never predict the future so try la,that's why people always tell you to do your best :) 

Good luck!

Saturday, September 03, 2011

Help me out!

I demand you to help me & I don't care if you know me or not but if you have facebook which I'm pretty sure you do,HELP ME LIKE THIS PICTURE! Cuz my friend here,called Vaneesha,is a very good singer & she got into the finals & of course she would like to have the most likes among all the other participants so help me out & do something good for today :)

Click this to like this page

And like this photo


Friday, September 02, 2011

I am not in a study mood,somebody kill me

I am in deep shit. Trials start next Tuesday & guess how I feel? Calm & collected -___- I am suppose to be full of determination & a shit load of energy to hit the books & ace this crap but no,instead I feel like eating & lazing all day at home. I've been going out almost everyday this holiday,today excluded,cuz I exclude myself to 'study'. But right now I'm still blogging! I got BM on Tuesday,we always start with BM & I hate BM! I was an A student for this subject during my whole primary school years,I entered storytelling competitions & I always win 1st place. Same thing goes on till form 3,the PMR year. But when form 4 came,I start to fall from my own mountain,I barely pass & I never bother to study cuz I thought I'd be able to survive still. Look at me now,I am gonna die if I fail BM. YOU CAN'T PASS SPM IF YOU FAIL BM so it's a pretty important subject but it's boring!!!! I hate Malay literature,I hate the idioms,I hate the grammar & vocabulary what so ever! But still I can't say no to it or else I'll screw my future up. Lets all study hard & ace this! PMR & SPM students lets kick ass! Be better than past year's students & break the record :D we,year 2011,can rule the world!